The silly games people play
I’m often amused by human nature, in particular the silly games people play. I often wonder why these games are played and to what end. So what’s this all about now? You’ll have to hang on or go bathe that dog and return or just bugger off completely – innit? For sometime I’ve been observing how some of my so-called friends and relatives operate. I’m not going to define what ‘so-called friends’ and ‘relatives’ mean. You’ll just have to take that as it is – or get stuffed.
The common pattern observable is as follows:
- I don’t hear from them for days, weeks or months on end.
- I attempt to contact them by various means (including telephone).
- I repeatedly get no responses OR busy shopping or visiting others, or having a meal, or in the middle of something I’ll get back to you shortly (and they dont’), or in the toilet OR ‘was just about to bathe the dog’, OR whatever similar reason plausible to themselves.
- This continues for some time over days, weeks or months.
If you’re an idiot you’ll be arguing the following for the above persons:
- ‘You keep picking the wrong times to contact people.’
- ‘To be fair people are busy and have their own lives.’
- ‘You’re nobody special so why do you expect people to drop what they’re doing to speak/communicate with you?’
And the reason why you’re an idiot for thinking the above is because it’s so bledy simplistic and stupidly argumentative. I’ll have you know that I wasn’t born this morning and am quite capable of picking the right times to find people. In any event is it so totally effortful to respond to an email?
However, after days, weeks, months or whatever, I then get a call from one of the above asking, “How are you? Long time no hear from.” And I invariably know what this means – and I’m usually right. I’m right because one of the above sort of people want or need something that is relevant to their lives. It could be just a bit of advice or something more tangible. At this point I’m usually thinking and holding back from saying, “You blasted idiot – you haven’t responded to any of my attempts to find you and now because you need something you find time to find me! Aren’t you even ashamed of yourself?!!” But I don’t say any of that, because it will cause animosity and risk be being given a ton of other plausible reasons which would basically fall into the category of dung. Yes dung – manure- you get it (or not).
The game is obviously avoidance until something pops up and then I’m not avoided. I mean if you try to contact someone such as a friend or relative and after umpteen attempts they’re a missed target, what are you supposed to infer? Either they’re dead – which they aren’t or that they’re simply avoiding you. And for that bunch of idiots out there, I’m talking about people in a closer circle of contacts.
The other day I made contact with a not so close contact via social media Site X (not to be named), to say, ‘Let’s talk on the phone.. I don’t want to chat on [Site X] ’ and I give my phone number as a reminder. Guess what happens next? I get a text message to my phone saying that they’ve left me a message on said social media Site X. Well guess what happens next? I eject that person without notice from my social media contacts and block them from all modes of communication. Huh? Draconian? I said it was a ‘not so close’ individual, so I couldn’t give a monkeys. So the point there is that both close and not so close contacts play the same stupid game.
But what’s behind all this? Why do people do this sort of thing? It’s very simple really:
- They don’t particularly favour me – is one theory – but need me for some sort of reserve situation about which I may be useful to them. [And hey, I know I’m not very favourable to most people because of my modus operandi in general, so nothing new there].
- They wish to have people (in general) around they can use for their own advantage in a time of need.
- They somehow feel at some level that their avoidance is not conspicuous or arguable away.
The above is not to say that it is totally undesirable to keep people around who may be useful to us. The point of all the above is to say, ‘have some sense of decency about it’ – and there is ‘no need for avoidance until a personally convenient time of need’ – and ‘if you’re going to be a hypocrite do you really want to make it that obvious?’ Chrysst!
The name of the game is ultimately keeping people around to use them conveniently and with conspicuous hypocrisy. So I’m coming to a conclusion that some of people who surround me are just users. I’ve not kept them around to use them for any purpose advantageous to myself, but they’ve kept me on their contacts list for their own contingent purposes. It’s going to be rather funny one day though when I pull up in my brand new Bentley, alongside a few of these folk, and say ‘How’s life? Wanna go for a spin?’ – and as they get to opening the passenger door – no excuses about dogs to bathe now – I step on the accelerator never to look back – with a sign in the rear windscreen “You’re a bledy hypocritical user – F* off!”.
So what’s next? Nothing! You go back to what you were doing and I go off to make my above fantasy a reality. And no – you don’t need to hope that I get that Bentley, because your hope does nothing for me. I’ll get it whether you hope or not!