Tea and other stuff may rain from the heavens

by Captain Walker

Categories: Humanities

I marvel at the way the humans think. But then  – are they actually thinking? The way you work that is to say, “Some do – some don’t.

Giant orbiting teapot

So – there is a massive teapot orbiting the Earth and it is about to pour tea on everybody. How do I know? Well, I adopt the logic below (which is an insult to the word ‘logic’).

How it works is like this: if there isn’t evidence that something ‘is not’, then it must be.

The existence of the ‘after life’ is proved as in conversation captioned, because in this ‘form of logic’ if there is no evidence that there is ‘not an after life’ that means it must exist.

So if you want tea to flow from the heavens above you assert that there is a teapot full of tea orbiting the earth. Anybody who doubts you, you simply tell them that they have no evidence that there isn’t such a teapot. Of course nobody has evidence that this teapot of yours doesn’t exist out there. So – that means it is right up there.

You can then assert that tea is gonna start being distributed tomorrow morning. Nobody will have evidence that  that’s not going to happen. So you assert that you are right!

Wealth from the heavens

But why stop at the after life, and teapots full of tea? You need to assert that gold bars are up there orbiting the earth, and about to fall soon. Tell everybody so that everybody can get rich! Come on – don’t be selfish!

I’m not even going to explain why the above line of thinking is totally wrong. Why? It would be a waste of my time. The human mind can believe whatever it wants and find a form of logic to justify anything it wants. To those who believe that the line of thinking is right, I say head out early tomorrow morning and wait for your tea and bars of gold to come down from the heavens.

A word of caution though. A standard bar of gold weighs 12.4 kg which is just under 30 lbs. If that’s falling at say 100 mph and it hits you on the head, you’ll be dead before you realise it. What you want to say is that, “There is no evidence that gold will fall at 100mph if delivered from the heavens!” In the absence of such evidence you will know that you’re safe. Well, I can agree you’d be safe but not due to the speed of gold raining down from above.

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