Psychoanalyse

by Captain Walker

Categories: Humanities

I’m not sure if people truly understand what ‘psychoanalyse’ means. In fact I doubt most people truly grasp what the concept is about. Why? In about 90% of instances, when people ask me what I do and I say ‘shrink’ – they respond with some comment that includes the word ‘psychoanalyse’. Most of these comments go like ‘so you’ve psychoanalysed all of us already? [with a grin on the face]’ – as if to joke about the possibility that I might have ‘psychoanalysed’ a crowd of people in say 30 minutes!! Well if that’s light conversation or a joke, it’s beyond stupid – and it ain’t funny.

I’ve noticed that people use words or attach meaning to them and they don’t know what the hell they’re talking about. So – people think that ‘psychoanalyse’ means to ‘figure out the psyche’ or some crap like that. If I now begin to spout expletives someone will think I’m rude or intolerant. So, I’ll restrain myself. Look, psychoanalyse means to perform ‘psychoanalysis’ and you don’t need to be a bledy expert in anything to know you cannot do psychoanalysis on the spot, in 30 min or in 2 hours. I was tempted to put a link on the word ‘psychoanalysis’, but I’m now doing less of that. If you wanna find out use Google. I’m not here to teach.

Perhaps the next time someone asks like the above, I should say, ‘Yes – I’ve psychoanalysed you and I’ve concluded that  the shallowness of your comment suggests you are stupid.’ One day.. one day.. I’ll have the power to tell people exactly what I think.


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