This article is not designed to be a book review. I have not read the whole book as yet: “The Manipulated Man” by Esther Vilar. Of course, you never heard of her. Who cares! To learn less do not read Wikipedia. I have read several parts of the book and will complete it soon. This article is an overview of the book’s impact and recent refreshed interest. As will be seen, there is a silent avoidance of the book in the USA and UK. Fortunately, it is still fully accessible for free in one place – link to be provided at the end.
In the first edition of the book Vilar states:
“Men have been trained and conditioned by women, not unlike the way Pavlov conditioned his dogs, into becoming their slaves. As compensation for their labours men are given periodic use of a woman’s vagina.”
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I came across the book whilst listening to many vids from the ‘Far from Eden’ YouTube channel. The book cannot be named on YouTube (see here). Read also: ‘The Perfect Mate‘ (2020).
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Introduction
Esther Vilar’s The Manipulated Man, first published in 1971, remains a controversial and thought-provoking work that challenges conventional notions of gender roles and power dynamics in relationships. Vilar, a German-Argentine author, sparked intense debate with her assertion that men, rather than being the oppressors, are in fact manipulated by women into becoming providers and servants. The book’s central thesis, that women skillfully exploit societal expectations and men’s inherent desire for female approval to secure their own comfort and security, ignited a firestorm of criticism upon its release, particularly from feminist circles who denounced it as misandrist and reductive.
Despite the backlash, The Manipulated Man has retained a degree of cultural relevance, experiencing a resurgence of interest in recent years, especially within online communities focused on men’s issues and shifting gender dynamics. This renewed attention stems partly from anxieties surrounding changing social norms and a perceived imbalance in the discourse surrounding gender equality. Some readers, while acknowledging the book’s provocative and often inflammatory tone, find resonance in its exploration of societal expectations placed upon men, the subtle nuances of power dynamics within relationships, and the influence of consumerism on human behaviour.
It is important to note that Vilar’s work is not a product of rigorous social science research or an empirical study of female mindsets. It is a work of social commentary that relies on generalisations and observations, often presented with a satirical edge. While these generalisations may not apply universally, and indeed may be seen as offensive by some, they nonetheless offer a framework for understanding certain behavioural patterns and societal pressures that resonate with a subset of readers. Vilar’s focus primarily rests on middle-class Western women, acknowledging that her observations may not hold true for women from different socio-economic backgrounds or cultural contexts.
In 1998, Vilar published a second edition of the book by the same title. Having trawled the internet, I can say that both editions of the book are not available for sale from major publishers and has gone out of sale from smaller publishers. While the book is not banned as ‘subversive literature’ on either side of the pond, it is clear that ‘the invisible hand of god’ (your political masters) do not want this book to be widely read. To understand why you’d need to read major parts of the book.
Excerpts from ‘The Manipulated Man’
Men are wising up
Whilst men are wising up, there has also been increased circumspection amongst women.
The importance of Vilar’s views
Looking back on the prevailing cultures of the middle-class Western women Vilar focused on, the value of her views, though controversial, lies in their ability to spark introspection and challenge deeply ingrained societal norms. While her generalisations may not apply universally, they nonetheless illuminate certain realities within specific social contexts.
Vilar’s work serves as a mirror reflecting the expectations and pressures placed upon both men and women in traditional relationships. It highlights the ways in which societal conditioning can shape behaviours and perpetuate power imbalances, even in seemingly egalitarian societies. By presenting a provocative and often unsettling perspective, Vilar forces readers to confront uncomfortable truths about the dynamics at play in their own lives and relationships.
While some may dismiss her work as misandrist or overly simplistic, its enduring relevance lies in its capacity to ignite critical thinking and self-reflection. Vilar’s observations, however controversial, encourage individuals to question assumptions, challenge norms, and strive for greater self-awareness in their interactions with others.
In a world where gender roles and expectations continue to evolve, Vilar’s work, viewed through a critical lens, can be a valuable tool for understanding the complexities of human relationships and navigating the ever-shifting landscape of social dynamics. Though her views may not be universally welcomed, their potential to spark introspection and foster greater understanding makes them a worthy contribution to the ongoing conversation about gender, power, and human connection.
Antagonism to Vilar’s views
The antagonism towards Esther Vilar’s The Manipulated Man has been significant and enduring, fuelled by her controversial claims and provocative style. Vilar herself, in the introduction to the 1998 (2nd edition), recounts receiving death threats and facing intense hostility for daring to challenge prevailing feminist narratives. Much of the criticism stems from her portrayal of women as manipulative and calculating, a depiction considered by many to be reductive and misogynistic. Critics argue that such portrayals reinforce harmful stereotypes and undermine efforts towards gender equality, overlooking the very real struggles women face due to systemic inequalities and discrimination.
However, it’s crucial to remember that Vilar’s work emerged during a specific socio-political climate, amidst the rise of second-wave feminism. Her ideas, though radical and often jarring, can be seen as a reaction to the prevailing discourse of the time, which she perceived as overly focused on portraying women as victims. Vilar’s intent, though perhaps clumsily executed at times, was to spark a conversation about the complexities of gender dynamics and challenge the notion of women as inherently powerless.
Furthermore, while her generalisations about female behaviour may be considered offensive by some, they resonate with a subset of readers who recognise elements of truth in her observations. Vilar’s focus on middle-class Western women, though limiting in its scope, reflects the social milieu she was most familiar with. Within this specific context, her work can be interpreted as a critique of certain societal expectations and behavioural patterns that perpetuate traditional gender roles and power imbalances, even within seemingly progressive societies.
The hostility towards Vilar’s work highlights the sensitive nature of discussions surrounding gender and power. While her provocative style and sweeping generalisations undoubtedly contribute to the antagonism, it’s important to acknowledge the historical context in which her ideas emerged and the potential value of her work in sparking critical reflection and challenging deeply ingrained societal norms.
Silent avoidance
I experienced great difficulty in finding Vilar’s book in ebook format or print from major and minor booksellers. I was struck that I found very similar content in several other books going by different titles. Demand for such books is steady though difficult for me to evaluate. There is no longer an issue of books going out of print in a digital age of ebooks.
Focusing on the non-availability of Esther Vilar’s controversial work, The Manipulated Man, reveals a curious paradox. While the book continues to spark debate and resonate with many people, it remains surprisingly difficult to obtain, especially in English. Despite the ease of distribution in the digital age, physical copies are scarce, and even online versions seem to be subtly suppressed. This scarcity is particularly perplexing considering the renewed interest in gender dynamics and the potential for such a controversial work to generate attention.
This apparent suppression, while not overt censorship, raises questions about the forces shaping the availability of information. Is it simply a matter of low demand or shifting cultural sensitivities? Or are there more deliberate efforts to limit the circulation of ideas that challenge prevailing narratives? The fact that the original German edition remains readily available while English translations are scarce adds another layer of intrigue. Perhaps Vilar’s critique of gender roles is more palatable within the German cultural context, or maybe there are deliberate attempts to restrict access to her ideas in English-speaking countries.
Whatever the reasons, this limited availability creates barriers to engaging with Vilar’s work and participating in the broader conversation about gender dynamics. It highlights the subtle ways in which ideas can be marginalised, even in a seemingly open and interconnected world. This “silent opposition,” operating largely out of sight, raises concerns about intellectual freedom and the potential for biases to shape the marketplace of ideas.
The mystery surrounding the availability of The Manipulated Man serves as a reminder to critically examine not only the ideas presented within a book but also the forces that influence its accessibility and reach. It underscores the importance of questioning the hidden mechanisms that shape our access to information and remaining vigilant against subtle forms of suppression that can limit the free flow of ideas.
Fortunately the book fully accessible and readable for free at The Manipulated Man by Esther Vilar (Against Feminism) : Esther Vilar : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive.
Conclusion
Esther Vilar’s The Manipulated Man, though a controversial and often polarising work, continues to spark debate and provoke thought decades after its initial publication. Its enduring relevance lies not necessarily in the universal acceptance of its claims, but rather in its capacity to challenge deeply ingrained assumptions about gender roles, power dynamics, and societal expectations. While Vilar’s generalisations and provocative style have drawn criticism, her work nonetheless serves as a catalyst for introspection and critical thinking, prompting readers to question the norms and behaviours that shape their own lives and relationships.
There has been renewed interest in Vilar’s thoughts, in recent years, particularly within online communities – and from other more recent books of a similar nature. This highlights the ongoing anxieties and uncertainties surrounding gender dynamics in a changing world. While some may dismiss Vilar’s work as outdated or misogynistic, others find value in its exploration of the pressures faced by men, the subtle nuances of manipulation, and the influence of consumerism on human behaviour. The difficulty in obtaining copies of the book, especially in English, raises further questions about the forces that shape the availability of information and the potential for subtle forms of suppression to operate even in a seemingly open digital marketplace.
Ultimately, The Manipulated Man serves as a reminder that the conversation about gender roles and power dynamics is far from over. Vilar’s work, though not applicable to all women and controversial, encourages us to challenge conventional wisdom, question our assumptions, and strive for greater self-awareness in our interactions with others. Its enduring legacy lies not in its universal acceptance, but in its ability to spark debate, encourage critical thinking, and contribute to a better understanding of the complex interplay between gender, power, and human connection.
